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Wednesday, February 6, 2013

Get a Life


By Samantha Grace

Last week my ten year old daughter challenged me to the Game of Life. You know, colorful spinning wheel, plastic cars, and blue or pink peg people. But instead of a game board, we played on her Kindle Fire. Okay. First of all, wouldn’t you think with the ability to add graphics the people would at least have facial features, hair, and arms? They don’t, but perhaps the makers of Life wanted to hang on to the nostalgic appeal.

Anyway, the game started off well. I breezed through college on a $100,000 loan and became an attorney. Yay for me! But then I only collected two paydays before I lost my job.

And then I was successfully sued, THREE TIMES. Suddenly, I wasn’t so surprised by my job loss. What sort of attorney can't win against a bogus lawsuit? And yes, it was total baloney, because I never even learned the reason I was being sued. Is that even legal?

Despite my inability to salvage my law career, I was lucky in love. Enter my hero. Broad shoulders, bald head, bluish complexion. Le sigh…

But get this, my husband and I didn’t receive any wedding gifts. Only a month earlier, my daughter – aka Game of Life nemesis – was married and I apparently attended the wedding and handed over a check for $5,000. She didn’t even send a thank you card and then had the nerve to completely ignore my happy day. *sniff* Oh, and did I mention she was the one to sue me three times? She’s so on my bad list now.

Well, I started working as a salesperson making peanuts after losing the law gig. It was okay. Lots of time spent on my feet, but I mostly enjoyed the people. But then…I LOST MY JOB AGAIN. The manager said I spent too much time trying on the jewelry, but I think she was just jealous because it looked better on me. I was starting to think I was playing an alternate version of the game called “Welcome to Your Crappy Life”, but things started looking up soon after. I became an entertainer and I went on to win the Ultimate TV Star Challenge, a TV dance contest, and then miracle of miracles, I wrote a bestselling book!!! (My daughter high-fived me on that one.)



In the end, I was able to retire at Millionaire Estates, but things aren’t always as rosy as they appear on the surface, because apparently the twin boys I had early in my marriage never left home. They were still sitting in the backseat as we pulled up to the retirement condo, probably fighting over who was touching whom.

So, how fun is that? A brand new life in 30 minutes!

What board games do you recall from your childhood? Do you play any virtual games? (Does anyone remember the game Pay Day? It’s where the game board was a calendar month and you had to pay bills. What the heck?!? And oddly, I liked that game. The real life version of it stinks, though.)    

26 comments:

  1. I loved the game of life! I occasionally played Monopoly but could never manage my property well. I hated operation, by the way. Clearing I don't have the nerves to be a surgeon. I spent more times playing cards (learning Poker at a young age). A bunch of the kids in the neighborhood got into the game Canasta one cold winter and we continued to get together to play tournaments even when we were in high school.

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    1. Jane,
      My friends and I played card games a lot. Our favorite was Spades. I used to love to play games, but my hubby and son aren't really into playing them, so it's just me and my girl. And she's brutal. LOL

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  2. Fun, Samantha! We played Monopoly a lot. Did you see that they just retired the iron piece and are replacing it with a cat?

    We also played Uno, Skip-Bo, and lots of other card games. And Trouble. That was a big one.

    My Youngest loves board games, so we play a lot--at Christmas he and Valiant Husband had a marathon game of Axis and Allies going...got so tired of having it in the middle of the floor! :-)

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    1. Deb,
      I saw that about the iron. I guess a cat is more appealing than housework. :)

      I loved playing Trouble. I don't know what Axis and Allies is. One of our newest favorites is Carcassonne. It's fun to build cities and roads.

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  3. Sam,
    We have Friday Night Family Night at the Johnstone household and every other Griday night we play board games. I always loved Monopoly and now my oldest son is Monopoly obsessed! But what I'm really dying to buy for the kids is Clue! I have the best memories of trying to figure out who killed the professor in the Conservatory with the candlestick. I've even considered this as a theme for a historical who done it! Wouldn't that be fun! I think I'll go buy Clue today!

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    1. Why doesn't it surprise me that Clue was your favorite game, Julie? LOL It was always my favorite, too! :)

      My daughter liked Clue when she was younger, but she didn't want to play the game so much as make up stories and act them out with the characters. I loved playing that with her! We had lots of drama playing out in that game. We had bad guys, romance, suspense. No murder, though, which was fine by me.

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  4. We gave our oldest the 'New Life' board game for Christmas after he liked playing hubby's old version. He's love playing Monopoly...mainly because he gets money...until he loses it all.

    I used to love playing Risk. Mom hated it and Dad would let me win a few countries and then pounce and demolish me. He says I wasn't ruthless enough. Guess I need to amp that up in my writing...no prisoners.

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    1. Beth,
      That's so funny about you not being ruthless enough. My hubby just said the same thing to me a few days ago. He was talking about how he used to wipe the floor with me in Backgammon, but he said it was because I wouldn't go after him like he would me. Now I think I'd play a lot differently. We were newly married then and I would have no trouble trouncing him now. :)

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  5. This post is hilarious, Samantha!!! Lmao!!

    I loved Life and Payday...something about collecting money really appealed to me ;) I've never mastered monopoly though.

    But I'm totally with Julie here...my fave has always been Clue...the Master Detective version, of course! Love love love it! And eric is the WORST player so I have no problem schooling him every time.

    I love cards too, though. My family used to play Rummy Royal when I was a kid...it's no wonder I love poker and gambling :)

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    1. I didn't even know there was a Master Detective version of Clue!!! I would totally love to play that. Cards really are my fav overall, but I'm not a poker player, which is too bad because my husband loves Texas Hold 'em. My problem is I don't know when to hold 'em and when to fold 'em. ;D

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  6. Life has always been one of my favorite games. I have it for the Kindle, the Wii and I own a board version. My older cousin attempted to teach her sister and me how to use an Ouji board but that game creeped me out so bad that I refuse to touch one now. My dad taught all of us kids how to play Indian and Penny Poker which gets played during the holidays to this day. I also love Monopoly, Risk, Clue,Yatzee, but I have many special memories connected to Scrabble. My grandmother taught me how to play scrabble during the week I would go stay at her home for a visit. Playing Scrabble with grandma became a tradition and to this day it's one of my favorites.

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    1. Misty,
      I love Scrabble! And that's one game I prefer to play on the computer. Maybe because I get impatient waiting for the other person to play. LOL. I also enjoy Yatzee and play it with my daughter. I don't know what I'd do if I didn't have her. She likes all the same things I do. :)

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  7. Great post! This brought back so many memories. My brother and I used to play Battleship (he always tried to cheat and see my board), Trouble, and Stratego. My friends and I played Clue; always a fun time

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    1. Nancy,
      Battleship was so fun! There was a game similar to Trouble, and I can't remember what is was called, but the game pieces were cones instead of pegs. I think you could land on another piece, but I don't remember what that accomplished. LOL

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  8. That was hilarious Samantha. I loved playing the game of life when I was a kid. All those twins seemed to be in everyone's cars. Guess, we were some reproducing machines!

    One of my favorite games to play was Monopoly and the card game WAR. Those two have always stuck in mind. :)

    PS Can't believe they got rid of the iron--that's just plumb un-American!

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    1. Marquita,
      Do you think kids today didn't know what the iron was? It's pretty old fashioned, even for when I was a kid.

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  9. Back in the dark ages, my siblings and I would spend hours playing a game called Easy Money which is like Monopoly. I absolutely loved it. Today, I play simple one-person games on my Kindle Fire. Hoping it will keep the Alzheimer's away. :-)

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    1. Back in the dark ages. LOL. Connie, you always make me chuckle. My hubby is a psychologist and he says learning new activities is great for keeping the brain clicking. :)

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  10. I used to love Life...also Monopoly was a big one in our house! I always had to be the 'dog' game piece. I love the traditional version but then they went and started making all crazy kinds of Monopoly versions (College Monopoly, Disney Monopoly) which I hate. We used to love playing UNO as well which is still a favorite!

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    1. Christi,
      I'm with you on not liking the different versions of Monopoly. My son had the Star Wars version, and it just wasn't the same. UNO is fun. I haven't played it in a while. :)

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  11. Mousetrap, Candyland, Trouble, Monopoly, and (my favorite) - Risk! To this day, both my husband and one of my best friends refuse to play Risk against me ;)

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    1. Erin,
      I never learned to play Risk, but I always wanted to. My friend had the game, but she didn't know how to play so I couldn't pull it out and learn it. I loved the idea of Mousetrap, but it never worked right. And I adored Candyland!!! But I liked playing with the gingerbread people and making up stories. :)

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  12. LOL. Samantha!

    I cannot believe your daughter sued you 3 times! Ungrateful children. ;)

    As a kid I spent hours upon hours playing Monopoly and then with the family - Trivial Pursuit. (Which is why so much of my knowledge is trivial. )

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    1. Ava,
      I'm the world's worst Trivial Pursuit player. If we ever get together for a game, make sure you don't pick me for your team. LOL

      And yeah! What's up with suing your mom?!? That's just wrong! :D

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    2. I Love Trivia Pursuit! No one will play it with me though.....could be that I'm good at it lol.

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    3. Mental note... Don't play with Misty unless I want to be embarrassed. :)

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